Name: Abigail M. Schilling
Neither chicken nor love
"I guess we used to date. I was a dumb freshman."
We were puzzled. How could the meat really cook in so few minutes? How could we really make such poor decisions back then?
There is a rule. It's called the Keeper Test and it deals with car door technicalities and subtle nuisances. It sends a hint to your date: whether your like him or not. She told him, but not until their fifth date.
He tried to tell me a hundred times. Ironically, I always argued with him: "actions speak louder than words." No wonder he got so frustrated.
"I don't think I've had non-chicken meat in a year. "
"I don't think I've had a non-weird date in a year."
"I don't think I've had a date in a year."
They talked on the phone and went out for dessert after basketball games. She didn't find him the least bit attractive.
The Keeper Test worked; he stopped calling. She fell for another player and focused on other things.
"Then I found out he was DATING ANOTHER GIRL."
"But you didn't like him."
"But I still wanted him to like ME."
The meat almost burned. We had to use tools, serious tools, to cut it. I hear it's supposed to be cut against the grain but we had a hard time finding the grain.
"How do you feel about the teriyaki sauce?"
"I'm not really a 'sauce for every occasion' type of person."
"Fine then, I'll have it myself."
I met your wife last night. She was small and pretty just like I always knew she would be and yet I was still surprised to see the ring on her finger. It's hard to know now whether I really wanted that ring or I just thought I did.
I certainly wanted to be the one to say no at least.
But then I guess, ironically, I'm too much against the grain.
posted by Abigail at 11:11 PM
8 Comments:
I think there's something to the "actions speak louder than words" thing. I had a conversation about it last weekend: I argued that the phrase is true, but Josh countered that just because his career/calling demands much of his time and attention, it doesn't mean that it's more important to him than I am. And, I believe him... I know the words are true, but sometimes they just don't feel true.
Words are tricky.
There is no grain in chicken. That's why people on Adkins can eat it.
People on Adkins are against the grain.
This post was lovely, Abigail. It was, in a word, mkguosmd.
Hello, Abigail.
secret word: mkguosmd (it means poignant and lovely)
Could we hear more about the Keeper Test? And could you also let me know if that has anything to do with Quidditch?
The Keeper Test: It is a test for the girl, to see if she is a keeper. When the guy opens her car door for her, she gets in and is supposed to lean across and unlock/open his door.
It's a little harder these days with auto unlock. But many a mom has warned her son. And girls have the right not to do it, thus making herself not a keeper.
Heather Anne,
I believe the Quidditch Keeper Test goes something like this:
1. Is the guy as hot as Oliver Wood?
2. No? Ditch him
I heart Oliver Wood.
I also heart Roonil Wazlib.
"Ah you like it now, but it's wicked fast and damn near impossible to catch..."
We make a fine pair of Heathers, don't you think?
Nerd
hehe =)
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