Identity Theft

"People change inside the maze.
Be careful not to lose yourself."
"Some game, huh?"
"Some game."

My whole life people have always been surprised at my low stress level.

"You seem so calm for being so busy."

"Man, if I was doing as much as you, I'd be crazy."

I always responded with "you gotta do what you gotta do" and the like. My busyness has never been a stressor for me. Sure, I like rest and I like not being busy but it doesn't ruin my life to be working a lot.

However, there is an indicator, a test, that when failed it suddenly becomes apparent that the insides of my life are starting to peel off after all.

It's The Cards Test.

My whole life people have always been surprised at my lack of wallet.

"Where do you keep your money?"

"In your pocket? Really? Really?"

I have four cards. Two forms of ID and two forms of charge. It's all I ever need and all I ever have and it's what I lose when my life starts to fall apart.

I first noticed when I was moving out of the dorms the end of my freshmen year of high school and I lost my ID card THREE TIMES in two weeks. I had to replace it every time I lost it too, because it was the kind of card you couldn't live without.

It's happened several times since, usually when I'm moving or traveling and there are so many things to remember I just can't remember them all. I just can't.

And now it's happening again.

The Cards? They're missing. We called the movie theatre and the restaurant and looked in the car and the pants and the whole house and they're missing.

And I'm relegated to laying on the couch and moaning about how my life is a joke and how I have so much homework and how I just will never ever survive. Ever.