I think the Postal Service wrote a song about us

It's strange when I suddenly realize I miss you. On nights like tonight when I round a corner and suddenly you are there. Your shirt, your hat, your almost fully likeness.

And then I remember you would never be here. You never were here.

And yet, on nights like tonight I feel an almost fully giddiness urge up inside of me at the thought of you. I can place the urge no better than I can place the desire to do math problems for fun or the reaction I have to all things aggressive.

All things are strange now.

**************

It's surprising when I suddenly realize I'm not in love. On nights like tonight when I'm tired and wanting but don't at all want to call you. I always thought I would. I always thought that if I wasn't talking to you then I would want to and everything in life would just be an absence of you.

Nothing is an absence of you. And I am so surprised because this isn't at all how I expected it. I was so prepared to pine.

Everything is just the same.

**************

It's striking the way your eyes catch the light when you look over at me. "Eyes on the road!" I say, a deceitful protest. What will the absence of you be like? Will I even recognize the light when you are not here, or will it be like being color blind and never knowing what blue really is?

I have a feeling that blue looks a lot like you in the morning when we go for coffee. Or in the afternoon when the cell phone screen lights up with your name. Or whenever I wonder exactly what difference green would make.

On nights like tonight I forget exactly what color the world is because everything is so different now.